Dating Confidence – Get Some

A few months ago this guy emails me on a dating site.  Not bad looking, decent profile, so-so email.  We exchanged a few emails and so I moved it along and gave him my number.  He called me a few times.  Probably 3 or 4 times in total.
Now, when we talked on the phone it was pretty boring.  There was just nothing there.  Nothing.  It was dull.  So I’m afraid I’ll have to nickname him “boring ball-less guy.”  For all I know he probably felt the same way I did and that I was dull.  It happens.  There is not always chemistry.  Which is why I usually like to talk on the phone first before agreeing to a date so that we can get a better feel for each other.  Email hides that.
So in those times that we spoke on the phone I had told him of my unemployment situation… blah, blah, blah…  and also he never once asked me out or showed any indication of wanting to meet me.  Now I don’t know if he is just too chicken or he found me dull too or what the deal was.  Well I really wasn’t crying over it because I found him so boring and our conversations so boring.  But still… I thought it was odd since he called more than once.
After that we didn’t communicate.  No biggie.  Then some weeks later he drops me some random email like, “hi how’s it going?”  I thought that was pretty lame.  So I sent an equally lame one liner back at him like fine – blah, blah, blah.
Then more time went on.  Weeks and weeks and now I get another random email from him out of the blue.  We had a few exchanges and this is how it went:
Him:  “So what have you been up to keeping yourself busy and fighting the men back?”
Me:  “Oh not too much, just living life.”  (he sent me a lame one liner so I sent one back)
Him:  “Hey glad you are doing well just working and staying busy with projects around the house. Going on a visit to see XXXX my son in a few months.who resides in Montana. How about yourself you seeing anyone special? How is work going?”
Me:  “Glad to hear you are doing well and going to see your son.  I’m actually unemployed remember? lol so work is not going well. lol  Are you interested in dating me or being my pen pal?”
Him:  “Good Morning,  Well of course I would like to see you just wasn’t sure about your schedule. Maybe we can get together let me know?”
Me:  “Well I had given you my number and we talked a few times but you never asked me out or asked about my schedule so….  I guess that’s why I was confused why you were emailing me again.  It’s okay if you are not wanting to go out with me. It won’t hurt my feelings.”
I added that last line because I figured maybe my question made him feel pressured to ask me out or something when that was not my intent.  My intent was shit or get off the pot dude.  I find it quite humorous he made the comment about not knowing my schedule especially when I told him early on I was unemployed and then again in my earlier email.  On top of that he never asked about my schedule or said or showed any interest in going out with me any time previous.  So it’s obvious he is just pulling that out of his ass.
I mean, you exchange emails, you call a girl 3 or 4 times and never say anything about meeting or going out and then weeks later email me some bogus line?  And then do it again weeks later.  What is the deal?  If you are 45 years old and can’t get enough balls to get down to it then I don’t know what to say except grow some confidence.  Plus do it on the phone, not in an email after I point it out.  Sheesh.
I like a confident take charge man.  Sure you may be nervous inside, but fake it.  I mean, what do you want dude?  Shit or get off the pot.  Don’t keep emailing me, I don’t want to be pen pals and if you are just doing it because you are bored, well move your boring ass to someone else to play games with.
Now I’m thinking after my last note he’ll ask me out.  Part of me wants to give him the chance but part of me knows it will be a waste of time.  I can see it now already just trying to set the damn date up…
Him:  “So… what do you want to do on the date?”
Me:  “Surprise me.”
Him:  “Do you want to go to dinner?  Or a movie?”
Me:  “That’s fine, I’m open.”
Him:  “Or we could do something else.”
Me:  “Dinner is fine.”
Him:  “So where do you want to go to eat?”
Me:  “Surprise me.”
Him:  “What kinds of things do you like, do you have any favorite places?”
Me:  “I’m really open to anything but Sushi.  So you pick.”
Him:  “Uh… do you like Mexican or Italian?”
Me:  “Either I don’t care.  Wherever you want.  Surprise me.”
Him:  “Would you like going to XYZ?”
Me:  “GAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!”  *loses mind*
Not to mention how the boring dating conversation will go.

4 Responses to “Dating Confidence – Get Some”

  1. Vivek Says:

    That was a funny account. I hope the next guy who reaches out to you has more balls and knows how to get what he wants

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  2. Boring Ball-less guy - Part 2 « Desert Martini Says:

    […] March 10, 2009 @ 4:29 pm } · { Single & Fabulous } So after I left this guy my email, he writes me and says he is available Wed, Thur and Friday and does want to get together and tells […]

  3. Oh Yeah, I Have A Profile « Desert Martini Says:

    […] want to be an email pen-pal and I thought I had made that clear.  Get the previous details here and here.  This guy seems not only ball-less but also […]

  4. I Think There Is Some Retardation Going On « Desert Martini Says:

    […] 2009 @ 2:09 pm } · { Jackasses, Single & Fabulous } Boring Ball-less guy is back.  Read part 1, part 2 and part 3 first if you are not familiar with my stories on him.  So….. in between […]

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