I Thought Everyone Would Be Rushing to Help

sadbrideIt’s funny how after I got engaged I thought it would be more fun, as a girl anyway.  You know, the looking through Brides magazines, having a shower, making engagement pictures, registering, shopping for things like the dress, the shoes the veil, picking my colors and theme and such.  Yet it has been the loneliest engagement.

My fiancée is in another state getting things wrapped up so we haven’t been together.  Just a small trip where we got the marriage licensee together.  We were supposed to have a friend take some pictures for us during that trip as well so we could use as engagement pictures here but that seemed to not materialize after she offered to do it for us.  It was doubly sad because I figured it would be some time for her and my guy get to know each other a bit.  Had I known it was an empty offer, I would have then made plans with someone else and then I would have engagement pictures.

My mom has been sick.  So she just didn’t have the energy, desire or just feel well enough to be involved in anything.  Even though finally my mom has gotten better and has more of her energy back, she still doesn’t seem to be reaching out to do things with me about the wedding.  I call and she doesn’t call back.  She doesn’t seem to ask me much about the wedding plans or just call or email me much.  I really don’t know why.  Most of my engagement she was sick – so I did everything by myself or had my fiancée help me through long distance emails or calls in helping to pick things out.  But it just isn’t the same with him not here.

So I registered by myself at the stores.  It would have been nice to share that with someone like a friend or my mom or my fiancée.  I can’t even do anything with my future sister in law or mother in law as they live overseas.

None of my personal friends offered to throw me a shower.  A couple of co-workers from work offered and are going to do it.  It just surprised me that my friends didn’t offer.  At one point I asked my mom if we could have the shower at her and my dad’s place.  They have the perfect home and space for entertaining and she seemed to not like that idea at all and tried to get me to look at different restaurants to host the shower at.  So again, something else I was to research on my own.  Something I should not be researching for the bridal shower.  To be honest that sort of made me mad.  I don’t want my guests to pay for food when they are buying me a wedding gift for my shower so just told the hostess let’s have it at her place.  My place is too small.  That honestly bothered me that my mom didn’t want it at her house.  Maybe my mom is just too tired and old and so she just doesn’t want to do this stuff.

Then I was supposed to go hunting for my cowboy boots to wear with the wedding dress this weekend.  My friend offered to do that with me.  Sounds like fun right?  So when the time came it didn’t happen again.  So I went by myself as usual.  All of my life I do seem to do things alone.  I guess I’m going to shop by myself for my dress and veil too.  I’m sure when people come to find out I picked out my dress and veil without asking them, they’ll seem all hurt and shocked I didn’t ask them.

Maybe I’m being selfish or uber sensitive.  I don’t know.  I don’t get it.  I thought when a lady gets engaged, her friends and family gush and rush to do these things with her and want to share in these things.  I just don’t know.  I get that the world can’t revolve around me and other people have their own problems and lives and all.  I get that.  I guess I’m just mistaken about how this was supposed to go and I’m really getting emotional about it.  Maybe it’s my hormones.  Maybe I just got married too late in life when everyone is older and on with their lives too deeply.  I’m sure had I been in my 20’s maybe it would be different.  Maybe I expect too much.  Whatever it is, it still hurts my feelings.


Why Do People Have to Touch Everything?

This is going to make me sound like a mean spoiled beeyach but I don’t care.

When you look at someone’s engagement ring, don’t touch it.  Don’t touch the diamond, or the setting prongs, or run your fingertips across the tiny diamonds in the band or ANY part of it.

How about don’t touch it?  Did I say don’t touch it?  DON’T TOUCH IT.

Fingers are oily and dirty ok.  I don’t want any of that or your fingerprints on my nice, new, freshly cleaned ring thank you.  Even I don’t touch those parts of my own ring.  I know that sounds picky but do you really need to touch everything people?  Yes it’s real and touching it doesn’t make it anymore real than it is.  You don’t need to touch it, just look at it.

I Said Yes


Once Again… A MAN Invented It

Got a new iphone 4 from my boyfriend today.  I was giddy with excitement and I love him to death for it.  He got a really good deal when upgrading our phones.  He got the phones at no cost but the monthly bill went up a bit of course for the services.  I was really excited and ready to pick out some cool decal skins for it.


The little fucker arrived and I don’t like the touch screen at all.  I have nails.  At least on my Sprint Rumor Touch it let me tap the screen with my nails and it recognized or sensed the touch.  Plus I had a slide out key board thingy and could use the corner of my nails to type with both hands.  On this iphone 4 it does NOT sense my nails AT ALL.  So I have to turn my fingers to the side so that it will sense my fingers.  No more slide out keyboard so I’m typing like a drunk retard on it.  With one hand.  Many mistakes.  Having to re-type over and over and over.  Takes me forever just to get a damn sentence written.  Then… then…. THEN…. I’ll hit the “send” button like 800 god damned times and it still won’t send.  I’ve tried lightly touching, hard touching, tapping, sliding, holding, you name it.  The iphone says FUCK YOU Martingirl.

Yes I know there is a voice command thing on there somewhere but I really don’t want to have to do a voice command for every single text because sometimes it won’t be appropriate to talk out loud into my phone.

Hey high tech man nerds, do me a favor, when you invent cool shit like this why don’t you test it out on other people of all ages and sexes many, many, many times to see if others can use your invention.  Others besides people with fingers the size of a 5 year old.  Mmm k?  Thanks.

**UPDATE:  So I went into work and went on the hunt for women with an iphone or galaxy with long nails.  One girl showed me and now I’m texting much better.  I finally mastered that send button and how to touch it.  THANK GOD.  I’m still only typing with one hand so I’m still slower on this thing but everyone says I’ll get used to it and it will get easier.  Good.

Of course I love the bigger screen, the way the text conversations look and ease of getting to messages and other tools on the phone.  much easier than all the menus and hoop jumping on my other phone.  The internet actually looks like the internet on this thing compared to my other phone.  So yes, I do like the iphone.  I must have given my Rambo a headache at first when I was trying to text and my pissing and moaning.  heh.  I love you so much baby and I really am grateful.  Thank you for your patience with me.

I’m Not the Average Girlfriend

A couple of months ago I had a texting conversation with my Rambo.  I kept meaning to post it but weeks of work travel took up my focus.

Rambo:  I registered to vote today.

Me:  You did?

Rambo:  Yeah I needed to get that done so I could vote in Texas now.

Me:  That’s hot.  You are turning me on.

The Devil – Chapter 92 – Hotels

The devil lives in aging hotels to make life hell.  Been having to do business travel for 6 weeks straight.  If that isn’t bad enough along with the pains I have to go through just to get one damn state over, I have to stay in the same boring ass, overpriced, aging hotel where the devil lives.  I say the devil lives here because no matter what room you stay in, there is always something jacked up.  There is never a perfect room.  Not only that but the things that are jacked up… it’s some sort of evil tampering with things enough to be not only annoying but kind of spooky too.

Room 1 – Every damn 3 way lamp in the room flickers and when you think you have turned the lamp off, it comes back on.  I swear every lamp in this one room did that.  I stayed in this room two weeks straight.

Room 2 – Every time I took a shower, the pipes behind the wall howled and squeaked.  Seriously?

Room 3 – Every time I turned on the TV the CC (closed captioning) would automatically be on.  I would go to the menu and turn it off.  This usually took 4 steps in the damn menu.  I would think they were shut off but no… the next day I would turn on the TV and there was the CC all over again.  Every time.

Room 4 – Every time I flush the toilet it makes a howling sound.  I’m not kidding.  I’m in this room now.  Can’t wait to see what is next week.

What is even more strange is I did get some nice Karma last week but it still very mysterious.  The 2nd day I came to my room to find a chilled bottle of Champaign and a plate of chocolate covered strawberries.  I call the front desk to see if someone is missing this nice gesture because obviously I didn’t request it.  They have no idea and are scratching their heads.  So, they tell me to enjoy it and I won’t be charged.  The 3rd night I get to my room and there is another bottle of chilled Champaign and plate of chocolate covered strawberries.  I call again.  Again they have no answer and to enjoy them at no charge.  I did get in touch with our contact who books the rooms for us at our company and he has no answer either.  It stopped after that.  I still think it’s the Devil playing tricks.

This is in a Hilton.

What’s Next?

Just got an email from my mom saying they are going to Vegas.  They leave Monday, the day of my birthday.  I think this is the 2nd year in a row they have gone to Vegas on my birthday.  I hate to sound selfish but it bothers me.  Especially now.  Just seems to be the icing on the cake these days.  Why does it seem every year for the last few years my birthday has been depressing?  I am seriously getting to the point where I really can’t stand my birthday.

*UPDATE:  My parents didn’t go to Vegas after all because I misread the email.  I’m a big baby!